Of late, I find it harder to believe that I really have anything of much value to say, considering my current life circumstances - top of the list being the sudden wearing off of the novelty of this whole 'virtual' office model thing. In the midst of all this tightening of economic belts by potential clients, it's taken a sudden turn towards the literal! The ensuing physical isolation has placed certain doubts in my mind regarding my actual value to society (and by extrapolation, social networks).
Anyone who follows me might be aware of the fact that I hardly tweet much lately and, to a large extent, that's why. But, put a drink in my hand and I find myself positively consumed by the urge to broadcast to the twittersphere. There's a peculiar devil-may-care relentlessness to my tweeting on those occasions. I can go on for hours without getting an @ mention back to speak of. In a word, I vent. For better or worse.
However, despite this virtual opening of my inhibition floodgates when under the influence, I remain always a nice person. Which brings me to my point... I read an article in this month's Cosmopolitan magazine about internet trolls - those nasty creatures that inhabit the dark underbelly of my beloved interweb: websites' comments sections.
Being generally self-deprecating and prone to much (oft irrational) hand-wringing anxiety myself, I can - to a certain degree - understand the probable myriad of self-esteem issues that must plague this particular group of individuals. But still, does it all have to be so nasty? Is it not a far nobler pursuit to just want to be liked - like me?
I don't get it. I mean, I too believe that anonymity is probably one of the web's most seductive qualities. I assume it is to some what my large goblet of wine is to me - license to go forth into the vastness of cyberspace, unhindered and unfiltered. Still, it's a tad sad in my mind to use that same anonymity for the pure purpose of inciting a response, only for the hollow victory of you being the only one who knows who exactly it was that caused the ruckus in the first place. And worse, is it really a victory when all you have done is just, in so many cases, cause real and personal offence?
At least I have the courage to own my drunken ramblings. As much as I may hide behind my bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon, I remain @TseliB: and I am completely willing to face the fact that whatever I subject my followers to via my twitstream will live forever on in the ether, inextricably linked to my name and online persona.
I am proud to say that in fifteen years, I will have no more regrets about it than I did the morning after I tweeted it. How many trolls can say the same?
